The Question that I Ask
by XFaheyX
Summary: Edited version.About Narcissa and Lucius Malfoy and how Narcissa fell in love with the git.Pg13 for abortion scene.Please R/R..(COMPLETE)
1. Default Chapter

Author's Note: Hey and thank you all for those who have come to read this. This is how I thought Narcissa might have met, felt, and lived with Lucius so don't flame me for those reasons. This is going to be intended as a short story and there are only two or three chapters to it. If you're looking for a long one go to my favorites and check them out they're really good.

Disclaimer: Narcissa and Lucius Malfoy and anything else you might recognize belong to one of my favorite writers, JK Rowling.

Her Pov

I had loved him and I still do. No matter what anyone says my bond to him can never be broken.

When did he like he is? Sure he was cold when we went to school together but that was only for the image. Whenever he had a chance he would give me that look that he rarely gives and only to me. I fell in love with him deeply and truly.

We were out in the green and silver common room cuddled together in front of the fire. We didn't speak we didn't breath a word. I listened to the silent beating of his crimson heart. I saw the silver strands of hair gleaming in the moonlight. I touched the soft skin that reminded me of silk. I breathed in the scent of him. The cologne that he always wore Dark Kindred. He never showed me much emotion and we never talked as much as normal couples do but I was satisfied with how much he gave me.

I heard his heart skip a beat and he then spoke."I joined the Dark Lord".

There was silence that tore my piece of mind into two. He turned his handsome gray eyes toward my blue ones waiting for a response.  
"What should I say?"I asked quietly feeling awfully dumb at such a question. He didn't seem to know the answer either. I dug deeper into his arms searching for his warmth but he seemed especially cold that evening. I slipped out of his arms and turned my pale face toward his."Goodnight" Was all I said while turning my back to him and retiring to my room. I turned to take a quick glance at him. I saw him staring intently at the fireplace his brow furrowed deep in thought and his masculine jaw clenched.

I couldn't sleep that night thinking over and over in my head about what he said."That didn't mean I should love him less should I?"I shivered at the old memories that flooded into my imagination. Uncle Martin from my father's side was a deatheater. He used to come over to our house sometimes drunk and sometimes morbid but always unwelcomed. Uncle Martin had a beefy figure and was a jerk plain and simple. He almost was close to raping my mother once and father had almost killed him in the process.

My Lucius would never turn out like that I told myself. I wasn't sure I was convinced but the doubts were washed away by happy dreams of Lucius and I in the future.

The next morning I sat next to him and we didn't ever discuss that event again. A couple of weeks passed by and he started to do these sorts of errands for the Dark Lord. He would be gone in a week or two whilst his father was encouraging him all the way sending fake notes to Professor Dumbledore.It changed him dramatically. The special look I cherished was worn on his face less and less.

One night I came out to look at the bright moon as I used to with Lucius all the time. I walked towards the velvet green couch and found Lucius there staring at the fire like the months before. Except he was covered in bruises and cuts."Lucius..."I gasped

"The Dark Lord sent me out on a mission, unfortunately I failed"He grimaced. I flew to his side giving him a look of concern.

"Lucius.."I started but was then cut off by him. My lips had been cold that night but he in instanly warmed them up. It was a passionate kiss that made me grasp for him not wanting to let go. His lips were soft and soothing covering me in such a strong emotion that made it hard to breath. The kiss then turned more intense and he began to roam around my body with his hands.

"Be my wife Narcissa"He whispered in my ear. I looked at him in total shock. I had dreamed about this moment dreamed about it more then one could think possible but before I could respond he spoke."I am going to warn you about the things that will happen in our marriage if you accept though so listen carefully"

He let go of me and stood up. I wanted those hands to be with me again but I sat and listened. 

"I will not display any emotion to you what so ever while we are in public or perhaps alone. The Dark Lord demands that emotion should be stored away so it will not weaken the person. Secondly you will accompany me in important dinner parties and other ones similar as a perfect Malfoy bride. You will obey me when I ask things that are necessary and will not argue."

The room was filled with a never-ending silence. I think he expected me to say no because he had started to walk away before I could answer."I accept Lucius". 

He turned around quickly with a surprised look on his face. I didn't know if anyone would had accepted to the requests he gave me but I was so in love with him that I would had accepted it with any demands.

We were married after Lucius and I graduated from Hogwarts.Our parents had no complaints. My family were respected wealthy pureblooded wizard family and so were his. Then after a year and a month the happiest news came to me. I was pregnant!

When the doctor told me I planned to make these arrangements to remodel the room and names for the baby all in the five minutes. I couldn't wait until I told Lucius.

I stared at the ancient grandfather clock nervously and almost trembled in anticipation. Eleven fifty four it read. Lucius usually came home after work at exactly twelve if he worked a late shift. He came right on time and I quickly stood and walked slowly to him with a wide smile on my face."I already know"He said lazily

I was struck with shock and disappointment as I was not the one to tell him"But how?"

He looked at me with a face that was blank and tired as usual and he sighed"The Dark Lord.

It was always the Dark Lord. He ruined our time together ruined the things I would happily tell him ruined our life MY life.

"We're going to destroy it".

I turned my head slowly to face his."What?"I hissed. It was the first time I had ever spoke harshly to him."The Dark Lord knows it's already a girl and I need a male heir". He said it plainly and simply as if he wasn't talking about a human baby.

"Lucius don't call the baby an "it" and we are not going to abort it". I looked at him with determined eyes but his showed no emotion."I can't have people look at me as a failure. I warned you before but you agreed to obey so you have no other choice".

My eyes threatened to spill down salty tears but I fled the hallway and up into the bedroom hearing him shout"I warned you Narcissa".

I cried that night. I had never done so in my life but this was different then the little incidents like broken bones that would cause pain. This pain would never heal and it would creep into my soul and heart. I felt it's sharp claws burying inside me already.

When the "embryo" as Lucius and the doctor would like to call it was just right enough to be discarded we drove to the wizarding hospital. I didn't speak not a word just obeyed and followed Lucius's way. The wizard there assured me he would use a special spell that would make it as if it was never there. He also whispered quietly to Lucius but not quietly enough that it would not cause any damage to the womb in any way so we could have more children. I wasn't sure I ever wanted children again. I didn't want to do this again. I didn't want to cry like I did if the baby was a girl again. I choked back the tears and held my head high when he asked if I was ready. I nodded. I remember him saying a spell to put me to sleep but that was all I did remember.

I was floating in a dark dark room. I heard whispers that made absolutely no sense. I was too calm and too happy in this situation I realized. Then I saw a little girl that was probably my baby. She was laughing with the loveliest voice as she held a sunflower in her hand. She had Lucius's silver hair and my bright blue eyes. I could hear here eight-year-old voice"Mommy" it whispered. I wasn't sure whether to cry or laugh along with this darling. I ran to her frantically as if afraid she would go away any second. I felt a pull and almost reached my hand to her's."Mommy"came the frantic cry.

"Narcissa wake up it's done"

I opened my eyes to see Lucius staring at me with the tiniest hint of worry in his eyes that I could only see."Why Lucius?"I murmured.

I saw his face stiffen."I told you Narcissa now come we must drive you back I have some errands to run". I think my love for Lucius would never be the same after that day never the same. I never smiled much after that day.

I recovered my figure and could go outside again. Lucius had me locked inside of the house when I was pregnant. Life went on or what was left of mine. Lucius went to work and occasional outings for the Dark Lord and I sat alone only the house elves for company. I ask only this question and I want it answered. When will my Lucius come back to me again?


	2. Again

Author's Note: I would like to thank everyone who has reviewed my story. I appreciate it!

Disclaimer: Everything except the plot belongs to J.K Rowling.

"Yes, yes that's right you are pregnant"

"Are you sure?"

"This wasn't expected?"

"No it's just such a shock after the miscarriage and all,"

It was six months after the abortion and then it happened to her again. She thanked the doctor for the "happy" news. Stepping out of the building Narcissa looked up at the perfect sunny blue sky.

"Dam weather" She grumbled while pulling out a pair of Gonko's sunglasses. A lot of things had changed about Narcissa over the past months. She quickly apparated back to the Malfoy mansion. A fleet of house elves were already awaiting her return. All of them were squeaking"Mistress would you like some tea or Mistress would you like some fruit?"

She dropped her purse on the coffee table and haughtily walked over to the green leather armchair. Throwing her sunglasses in to the fire she rubbed her temples and frowned. In the background the elves picked the purse up and set down a tray containing of half a grape fruit and lemon tea. Narcissa jerked up so suddenly from the chair it made the house elves jump all at once."I'll be in my quarters, make sure no one disturbs me"she ordered

Narcissa entered a hall filled with the Malfoy ancestor's stares."Here comes the whore"the paintings whispered. Narcissa paid them no heed. She wasn't in the mood to deal with anyone today. After a long trail of flowers on tables she reached her bedchamber.

Narcissa went straight for the mattress not bothering to even take her shoes off. She breathed in to the pillows heavily for a few minutes. If a person was in the room they would have expected her to be in a deep sleep. She rolled her head to the ceiling. It had been magic ked so that if Narcissa said show me my heart it would appear painted with angle filled sky."Show me my heart"she whispered.

Her bright blue eyes scanned the marvelous work of art. Cherubs were sprinkled across the enormous place. Many of them were carrying flowers or animals in their chubby arms. All of them had their own expression which was fascinating to watch. There was this one cherub who tried to pluck a hair from another fellow cherub. He succeeded but ended up getting chased by the girl with the bucket of water in her hands.

Narcissa laughed with true merriment. It had been the first real laugh she had in months. "I could have shared this with Devonny"

Her smile quickly dissapeared. She waved her hand and the painting faded in to the white ceiling again. She got up from her bed and smoothed her dress. Walking toward the bedroom wine cabinet she stopped at the mirror. She got closer to it feeling her face with her hands. There were three or four wrinkles that shouldn't have been there so early and dark circles that were forming under her eyes. Narcissa hadn't been sleeping or eating much. "What happened to me?" She rasped

Turning away from her reflection she opened the cabinet to search for alcohol. Pouring herself a glass of expensive French wine she drank it in one gulp. She looked at the glass that was in her hand for a moment. Narcissa threw the small thing at the wall. She held the whole bottle of wine in her hand thinking "I'll forget soon enough"

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Where is Narcissa?"

"In the bedchambers Master"said the house elf nervously

Lucius had just returned from the Dark Lord's meeting. He dropped his jacket to the ground and headed for the bedroom. Opening the doors with a slam he spotted Narcissa sleeping on the bed. Lucius shook her roughly. She a woke and squinted at him"Lucius?"She said doubtfully

"You've been drinking"he stated 

"How'd you know?"

"Anybody could have smelt it"he replied cruelly

She got up from her bed and patted her hair"I suppose you know from the Dark Lord"

"I do"he said while looking at the wall

"What's the sex?" She asked coolly as her heart thumped with speed

"Male and the Dark Lord wants it to be named Draco"

Narcissa could have let a loud sound of relief and joy if Lucius wasn't there."Don't go jumping for glee yet Narcissa"he said with malice in his voice."Our son will be given the good things in life at first but he will be prepared to join the Dark Lord"

"Don't I get to raise our son too? She said jokingly

"That's up to me not you"

He then turned and left the room. Narcissa stood there pondering "How am I going to stop my baby from turning in to a Death eater?"

AN: These are just going to be glimpses of the future

"Congratulations you have a healthy fine son"the nurse said while handing a baby with wispy platinum blonde hair over to Narcissa

"I'll promise to love you forever my Draco"whispered Narcissa. She let a tear fall this time just for him.

"What will the name be Sir? Asked the doctor

"Draco Malfoy"

"Father I want the best brooms for my team"  
"Mother why does Father have other women in bed?"Asked six year old Draco

"Because the Dark Lord commands it"Narcissa replied coldly

"It is time you had some discipline boy", Lucius said to the confused thirteen year old Draco

"You understand now that when I command you obey?"Lucius said to his blooded son

"Yes father"Draco said weakly

"Draco how could you?"

"Draco?"

"Draco..."

"DRACO!"

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

REPLIES to Chapter 1 Reviewers

Draco and Aragon's Love Slave: Happy (late)Birthday ^_^

Spitfire360:Thank you ! I get hyper all the time too.

Crystaline Blood: Thanks!*hands you a tissue*

K (): Welp I just thought Narcissa wasn't all bad. She might be depicted as just a cold cruel wife of Lucius Malfoy

but I'm trying to show that she has feelings too.

Aaren: Thanks for pointing that out. I'll be searching for a beta reader.

Ca (Rinoa Toki Moro Lockheart: Thank you very much!


End file.
